Each person is truly as unique as his fingerprints and DNA. Every being has his talents, gifts, sets of preferences and skills. Every supermom and superdad would know that each of our sons and daughters is indeed a different person. The way we communicate and treat each one of them will not be the same at all.
Iâ€™ve always believed that equality may not mean being fair. Equality could mean that if I buy a new pair of rubber shoes for one, I should buy for all. But that may not be fair at all. What if the other does not need or want a new pair of rubber shoes? What he needs could be a more expensive pair of leather shoes. If I give one a new ipod, that doesnâ€™t mean that my other son would also like to have one too. For all we know, the other would prefer to just save the money either for himself or for another sibling. Or maybe save the money for a future bigger item purchase.
Another thing that I keep on saying to my kids is that EVERYBODY IN THIS WORLD is intelligent. One may be a genius in mathematics but poor in cooking while another has great skill in the creative concoction of new recipes while having low grades in school. This understanding that every person is a genius in his area of intelligence has allowed my children to appreciate every person instead of judging anyone as less intelligent than them.
One thing though that is the same for ALL OUR CHILDREN is this: every single one of them will at one point engage in computer games.
As parents, one of the responsibilities is to guide our children to watch the right movies, play the right games and be with the right playmates. Here are some of my insights when in comes to playtime with the kids:
1) Kids want to play and have fun. And we as parents should take the opportunity to spend the fun moments with them while they are young not only to weave beautiful memories with them but also to have the opportunity to have small talks and be able to discuss virtues and values that we want to impress upon the young minds;
2) Kids learn fastest when they are enjoying what they are doing (Hmmmâ€¦ doesnâ€™t this follow for adults too?);
3) There are a lot of games for every type of child: word games, puzzles, adventure, mystery and games of logic, etc.;
4) Since I promote a violence-free world, I influence my kids to play educational games that test their wits and reflex, or even teach some concepts of caring for a farm or aquarium and time management;
5) I cannot just buy one game and expect all my kids to enjoy that same game which could mean a bit expensive for the pocket. As a wise super mom, I can choose to look for activities that don’t need to spend money, or play the free online games, or subscribe to a game membership site for unlimited games or just find ways to make more money to afford all the games that my kids want to download! :-);
6) There are so many other activities that I can do with my kids like online scrapbooking, singing together some home-style karaoke challenge or doing crafts and making artworks.
All of these activities are part of building trust and respect and anchors for our children to hold onto as they grow older.
Most especially, one insight that I have learned is this: The simple joys that simple games and crafts that a parent has lovingly shared with the child will create indelible heartprints even as the child grows older. Those “forgettable” moments as far as we are concerned could be among the most memorable moments that the child would treasure forever!